The initial phase of a transfer abroad, Hofstede teaches me, is the phase of the tourist. Okay, so let's enjoy it entirely. I have already tasted the smells and bustle of Chinatown, which you access through a door with a dragon, I've seen the water park in the distance, the Ontario Place, and the medieval house near the port, dedicated to tournaments in costume and medieval dinners. But now it's time to get serious, and buy the Toronto Pass: I have nine days to visit the five main attractions of the city, ready set go!
I start from the "castle" of Toronto, which is not a castle but the home of the eccentric Sir Pellatt, who for the joy of the very Victorian neighbors wanted to transform his house into a castle worthy of Ludwig 2nd. I chose a good day, and like me THOUSANDS of school children on field trips and even a nursing home... what a fluke. At the entrance I'm given the audio guide, too bad that the map and the signs don't make clear which number to select, which makes it unusable. Inside Casa Loma there are all sorts of stuff: bathrooms (the house dates back to 1911!) even with a shower and then lifts, secret passages, an endless wet tunnel that leads to the stables (why don't you go there in the sunshine?! ), the towers with the steep spiral staircases with hundreds of noisy kids that come down when I would go up. But the view of Toronto from the towers is worth the wait. I give up having lunch at the restaurant of Casa Loma ($ 15 a sandwich...) and instead I have lunch downtown, with a "Spanish" ricotta and spinach lasagna... wasn't that Italian?!
The evening shows a clear and cloudless sky, so I decide to visit the CN Tower. To the disappointment of Toronto people, this tower -nothing but an antenna, in fact- became the symbol of the city when, in the '70s, the telephone company and the railway company decided to join forces to build it. Soon only the Canadian National, the railway company, was left and realized the touristic potential of the tower. In fact, today 20% of the profits comes from the antenna, 80% from the tourists! Actually, the 553 meters of the tower seen from the bottom are impressive, especially when illuminated by purple at sunset. The first stage of the visit provides a dynamic show at the cinema, a show that I had already seen in Gardaland, but with the unexpected addition of special effects. In fact, when the log protagonist of the movie fell into the waterfalls.... the seats of the cinema watered us generously! And when there were crocodiles, we felt tails flapping against our legs, how disgusting! Then finally, soaking wet, you can access the tower, by a transparent elevator that goes so fast that you don't even have time to be scared. The show at sunset from 346 meters high is breathtaking, and you do not realize that those buildings are skyscrapers. I take a shit load of pictures, also from the transparent floor, and look for the exit to the observation point almost ending in the very exclusive luxurious restaurant OOPS! While waiting to go down, I read on a wall the many records marked on the CN tower: the fastest to climb it, the fastest to climb up the stairs, the fastest to climb up in a wheelchair, the tightrope walker who started from here walking on the wire to I don't know what skyscraper, the group of idiots that went down the stairs of the tower with a washing machine, a television and a wardrobe.... once I went down I took some more pictures of the illuminated tower, indescribable!
The third monument is the Royal Ontario Museum, ROM, that if anyone has visited the British Museum... Well, it's not even worth it to get in, it's enough to take pictures of the futuristic exterior.
Then it's time for the Ontario Science Centre. The journey is long, around an hour and a half, and I spend it observing the many techniques of travelers to sleep in the most absurd positions without falling. It's raining cats and dogs, so it's the ideal day to shut me up somewhere... and that's the same thought of the thousand students visiting the science center, sob.The first thing I see is a huge structure, all animated by the motion of the balls thrown by children, causing a number of mechanisms to push other balls and so on: hypnotic, I almost move a child aside and start playing... No, maybe it's not a good idea. In the center there are a lot of demonstrations, and experiments to do with all the five senses, but also to understand the perception of truth, to study the different areas of the brain, so on and so forth. After going through the rainforest, I decide to visit the Harry Potter's exhibition, like any good fan. The price is expensive, but I soon find out that it's completely worth it. Just entered, a "magician" makes me wear the Sorting Hat that assigns me to Gryffindor, and then the train to Hoghwarts waits for us, to introduce us to the Gryffindor common room, the Quidditch goals, Hagrid's hut, the giant chess, the Great Hall with candles hanging from the ceiling: all the costumes and furnishings are from the original set, I gloat as a kid in a candy store! Needless to say, the gift shop will sell wands and candy made in Hogsmeade! I leave the science center fully satisfied with my visit.
If I thought that an hour and a half's journey was long, the two hours and something to get to the Zoo are an eternity. It's equatorial hot, the site said "10 km to walk" and yet I decide not to buy the ticket for the Zoomobile train, "because" I think, "I'll buy it after..." NO, the answer is NO, you can buy it only at the entrance. The maps scattered here and there lack a tiny detail: the symbol You Are Here, therefore they're useless. So I resign myself to walk randomly all the 10 km, and three and a half hours later I'm wasted. I've never seen so many animals in one zoo: elephants, giraffes (with which I have a photo taken), zebras, rhinos, grizzly bears, polar bears (which take a nap in the shade, poor things...), lions (hidden, alas), snow leopards (hidden, to which a visitor provides her capricious little girl as a snack... but she's not acceptable to them either), peacocks strolling alongside us and ominously croaking, owls, sharks, tarantulas, marmots, snakes (brake for the snake, a sign warns the drivers... so snakes are not only in the glass cases), kangaroos, camels, gorillas... I could go on forever. After the first hour and a half under the sun, it becomes increasingly uninteresting to see all the points of observation and I begin to rant against the signs, "Howler Monkey ->" Fuck howler monkeys, I can skip this! "<- Cormorants" but who gives a fuck about cormorants, except for Alessio Boni in Tutti Pazzi Per Amore, EH??! Then I decide to take some refreshment with a slice of pizza made in Canada, and while I'm taking back control of my legs a small crowd gathers to rescue a baby bird fallen from its nest one meter from where I sit.... not even a moment's peace! The latest attraction is the pool of shaved rays -meaning that they're deprived of the stings, so you can pat them... disgusting, it feels like touching a square eel! I finally let myself fall on the seat of the bus, and almost two hours later I get on the second bus... that will not leave. Because an angry passenger refuses to pay -but doesn't get off- because he waited too long and the bus is too full so he pretends to travel for free. In order to avoid being lynched, he resolves on paying. Needless to specify the nationality of this character who approaches me to ask for some information.... Italian. And of course, I answer in English. May we never be associated!
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